I was born on this date, some 39 years ago, to a 17 year old high school senior, and to a 19 year old smooth talker, who decided that parenthood was not for him. I honestly don't know when he first saw me, but my first memory of him was at almost nine years old, on one hot summer day in 1985. I wouldn't see him again until 1995, as a second semester college freshman...but enough about him, as this is my day.
I grew up dirt poor in Sampson County with my maternal grandmother, who quit school in seventh grade to take care of her ailing father, and a mother who had barely finished high school due to my traumatic birth, and spending so much time out of school. Despite these overwhelming odds, they both stressed to me the importance of education, and I was able to not only attend college, I successfully obtained my degree, and returned two years later for a Master's.
In these first 39 years, I have been molested, attempted suicide twice, battled depression, lost my grandmother, loved and lost after nine years, and lost my best friend over 20 years about six years ago, financial ups and downs, and job changes. Through it all, I am reminded of the title of one of the late great Maya Angelou's books, "Wouldn't Take Nothing for my Journey Now."
Through so much pain, I have survived and now I am whole again. I will not be people pleasing anymore. I will not be fighting to keep people in my life who do not want to be there. I will learn to say no more. I will not hold grudges. I will speak my truth.
I am ready for the next 39 years, I vow to myself and to all those who know me, there will be a new me. My physical being hopefully will ebb and flow due to the natural aging process, but my mental, my spiritual, and my emotional will be new.
I hope that you are ready and if you are not, it was nice knowing you!
Until next time....
No comments:
Post a Comment