I was sitting in Chik-Fil-A on yesterday enjoying my cookies and cream milkshake. It was terribly slow, then again, it was the middle of the day.
Even one of the workers commented on how slow it was to her fellow co-workers, although her commentary kind of rubbed me the wrong way. She said the following, and I am paraphrasing here: "It is awfully slow in here today. I guess the welfare mothers didn't get their checks yet."
Have you ever heard something, but wished that you hadn't, or hoped that the person repeated it, thinking maybe you misinterpreted what the individual said? Nope, I heard her correctly.
Here is a woman who is probably barely making above minimum wage herself, snubbing her nose at what she considers a welfare mom.
It got me to thinking about the state of our world. Bruce Levenson and Donald Sterling have enough money to get away from black people, who they feel better than. White people without their level of money, like George Zimmerman and Darren Wilson just murder our boys in cold blood, when they don't have the money or means to get away from us.
Black intellectuals and the middle class snub their nose at the blacks who they consider to be better than them, by calling them ghetto and ratchet, criticizing every thing they do, which they feel shames the race, rather than mentoring and giving back.
Even when I lived in Florida, where there is a huge Hispanic population. Puerto Ricans really took offense if you called them "Mexicans"...not because there was such a deep pride in their culture, but because they felt Mexicans were beneath them.
At the root of all this hatred, is classicism. We have to do better! We have to teach our children, our young people, that just because you have achieved, just because you may have moved beyond past circumstances, just because you have amassed a certain amount of materialistic possessions, does not make you better than your fellow man.
Ever heard of the phrase, "here today, gone tomorrow."? This is the case for many and their materialistic possessions. Many of us are only a paycheck or a catastrophic illness away from poverty.
Let's do better, be better. Because we are all our brother's keeper!
Until next time....
Wednesday, September 10, 2014
Monday, September 8, 2014
Ray Rice and Battered Women's Syndrome
I am not going to even begin by stating how I am appalled at the reactions over Ray Rice's indefinite ban from football, and I say indefinite because that is the wording the NFL gave us, which is code for let us, let this blow over, and let people forget, and well...you get the rest!
But before any of you begin asking why his wife still married him, after he beat her, while they were just engaged. Before you go talking about her self-esteem, and how she is a gold digger who was looking out for money. Before you start spouting how beautiful she is, and she can have any man that she wants. I have two words for you: Tina Turner! I have two more words for you: Halle Berry!
See where I am going with this?
The late Ike Turner started beating Tina while they were dating. Actually, he was still living with his wife Lorraine, raising children, and Tina was the sidechick ( I hate that term, but I digress). But guess what? He left Lorraine, had children with Tina, married her and beat her mercilessly, almost daily for 16 years. Tina is smart, Ike didn't have enough money for her to be a gold digger, and she was beautiful, but she stayed....why? Battered Women's Syndrome. It is a real condition. It is not made up. It is real!
How many of you have salivated at how beautiful Halle Berry is? How she can have any man that she wants, because of her beauty and her great body? Guess what? She has lost 50% of her hearing in one of her ears, because an ex-boyfriend beat her until she lost it.
Let's stop with the ignorant conversations about domestic violence. The only one to blame in this situation is Ray Rice! His hands inflicted the injuries, his lack of concern and respect for his fiancee, now wife, allowed him to reach those levels of abuse and mayhem.
And if you believe the NFL didn't know, I have a bridge in New Jersey to sell you. Hopefully, one Christ Christie won't block! They knew. They are ducking and covering now that we know, and they did nothing about it. Watch the fallout in the weeks to come. Heads will roll, and people will be apolo-lying right and left (Apolo-lying is when you apologize not for what you did, but because you got caught).
But don't get caught up in the victim blaming and shaming. Don't get caught up in your celebrity/hero worship or because you are such an avid football fan.
Get caught up and get interested, because today it is Ray Rice's wife. Tomorrow it could be your daughter, your sister, your mother, your aunt.
Until next time.....
But before any of you begin asking why his wife still married him, after he beat her, while they were just engaged. Before you go talking about her self-esteem, and how she is a gold digger who was looking out for money. Before you start spouting how beautiful she is, and she can have any man that she wants. I have two words for you: Tina Turner! I have two more words for you: Halle Berry!
See where I am going with this?
The late Ike Turner started beating Tina while they were dating. Actually, he was still living with his wife Lorraine, raising children, and Tina was the sidechick ( I hate that term, but I digress). But guess what? He left Lorraine, had children with Tina, married her and beat her mercilessly, almost daily for 16 years. Tina is smart, Ike didn't have enough money for her to be a gold digger, and she was beautiful, but she stayed....why? Battered Women's Syndrome. It is a real condition. It is not made up. It is real!
How many of you have salivated at how beautiful Halle Berry is? How she can have any man that she wants, because of her beauty and her great body? Guess what? She has lost 50% of her hearing in one of her ears, because an ex-boyfriend beat her until she lost it.
Let's stop with the ignorant conversations about domestic violence. The only one to blame in this situation is Ray Rice! His hands inflicted the injuries, his lack of concern and respect for his fiancee, now wife, allowed him to reach those levels of abuse and mayhem.
And if you believe the NFL didn't know, I have a bridge in New Jersey to sell you. Hopefully, one Christ Christie won't block! They knew. They are ducking and covering now that we know, and they did nothing about it. Watch the fallout in the weeks to come. Heads will roll, and people will be apolo-lying right and left (Apolo-lying is when you apologize not for what you did, but because you got caught).
But don't get caught up in the victim blaming and shaming. Don't get caught up in your celebrity/hero worship or because you are such an avid football fan.
Get caught up and get interested, because today it is Ray Rice's wife. Tomorrow it could be your daughter, your sister, your mother, your aunt.
Until next time.....
Wednesday, September 3, 2014
Jennifer Lawrence and Why Stealing Pics is Part of Rape Culture Thinking
I was amazed to be on social media over the weekend and to see reports of nude photos of Jennifer Lawrence circulating over the internet.
What was most amazing to me, is that people were laughing, celebrating, and actually cheering that this happened. (These are probably the same mofos who watched the R. Kelly sextape with a minor, to see if it was actually him or not).
Nobody is concerned that Jennifer, despite her celebrity status, is someone's daughter, someone's sister. These same mofos gawking, trying to get their hands on her photos, would be the same guys will to catch a charge if it were their mothers, daughters, or sisters, so why do this to someone else?
And there are those who say she shouldn't have taken them in the first place. Are you serious? HER body, HER pictures, HER phone, and HER right to privacy. What part of that do you not get?These are the same people who will call a woman a bitch in a heartbeat, or won't hesitate to cheat on their wives, or girlfriends, or he won't hesitate to rape, although it's only rape if she actually remembers, right CeeLo Green?
We are a society that likes to blame the victim. Surely, your past and present behaviors are justification for me not being able to control myself and be a decent human being. Wait what?
Just like blacks and other minorities, women even in 2014, are still seen as property, which is why they can't take photos of themselves on their personal phones, and expect privacy. Which is why they can't sleep with any man they want and not be called a foul name. Which is why they can't even consent to sex.
I live by a creed. Give women the same type of respect that I would want someone to give my mother, my sister. Why is that so hard? Because Karma is real, and today is Jennifer Lawrence, but one day it could your daughter, your sister, your mother. Think about it!
Until next time....
What was most amazing to me, is that people were laughing, celebrating, and actually cheering that this happened. (These are probably the same mofos who watched the R. Kelly sextape with a minor, to see if it was actually him or not).
Nobody is concerned that Jennifer, despite her celebrity status, is someone's daughter, someone's sister. These same mofos gawking, trying to get their hands on her photos, would be the same guys will to catch a charge if it were their mothers, daughters, or sisters, so why do this to someone else?
And there are those who say she shouldn't have taken them in the first place. Are you serious? HER body, HER pictures, HER phone, and HER right to privacy. What part of that do you not get?These are the same people who will call a woman a bitch in a heartbeat, or won't hesitate to cheat on their wives, or girlfriends, or he won't hesitate to rape, although it's only rape if she actually remembers, right CeeLo Green?
We are a society that likes to blame the victim. Surely, your past and present behaviors are justification for me not being able to control myself and be a decent human being. Wait what?
Just like blacks and other minorities, women even in 2014, are still seen as property, which is why they can't take photos of themselves on their personal phones, and expect privacy. Which is why they can't sleep with any man they want and not be called a foul name. Which is why they can't even consent to sex.
I live by a creed. Give women the same type of respect that I would want someone to give my mother, my sister. Why is that so hard? Because Karma is real, and today is Jennifer Lawrence, but one day it could your daughter, your sister, your mother. Think about it!
Until next time....
Respectability Won't Get Your Respect But It May Get You a Coffin
Our black children are getting gunned down in the streets every day. Statistics say literally every 29 hours. This frightens me, concerns me, so I am looking for solutions, not band-aid fixes.
To black intellectuals, please stop with the respectability bullshit. You know what I am talking about: the conversations about how voting brings change, stop sagging pants, stop watching and/or starring in reality shows, stop shaming our race. The list goes on and on.
Question for all of you pseudo intellectuals: Would you tell a rape victim to stop sleeping with men, or stop wearing short clothes to entice men? Would you blame her for her rape? No, you wouldn't! First of all, it is disgusting. Secondly, it is not the politically correct thing to do, and we all know how we love to be pc.
Well, if you wouldn't treat a rape victim in that manner, why are you blaming black people for over 400 years of systematic, institutionalized peril?
It takes all types of people to make the world what it is, from the Harvard University professor to the teen with the sagging pants, our culture is comprised of a beautiful rainbow of people, and their diversity, and their differences are what make this world so great.
We all have rights, designated by the Constitution, which should be upheld by both politicians, law enforcement, and private citizens.
Those rights include: the ability to walk to a local store and return home safely to your parents (Mike Brown, Trayvon Martin), the ability to play your music at whatever volume you choose in a public place, and still make it home safely to your parents (Jordan Davis), and the ability to have a car wreck, and knock on someone's door seeking help and not face an assassin's bullet (Renisha McBride, Jonathan Ferrell), to shop in Wal-Mart, purchase a toy gun, and not be gunned down for it in an open carry state(John Crawford), and to walk the streets of LA and know that you will go home and live another day (Ezell Ford).
Remember MLK? The man who white racists used to quell black anger when we have received some type of injustice, or the go to guy that black intellectuals use to "shame" others for their behavior. He was beyond respectable: graduated from high school at 15, had a doctorate by age 26, beautiful wife, children, didn't sag his pants, Baptist minister, freedom fighter, but it didn't stop James Earl Ray from shooting him dead at the tender age of 39.
Do you know Forest Whitaker? There is not anyone in the entertainment industry with a more impressive resume. He is both a multi-talented actor and director, but he was racially profiled in a New York deli, just one month after Trayvon Martin's murder.
So if it were as easy as respectability, most of us, would never have any worries, but the truth is whether you are wearing a three piece suit, speak the Queen's English, and have over 40 honorary degrees like the late, great Dr. Maya Angelou, to the right racist, your respectability doesn't mean a hill of beans, and could still lead you to an early grave.
So instead of respectability conversations, let's have deeper, more change inducing conversations. Let's finally confront systematic racism.
I need my fellow white brothers and sisters to speak on it, combat it. Stop worrying about your country club status, and your friends and family blacklisting you, and speak!
I need for my fellow black brothers and sisters to stop making excuses for it, pretending it doesn't exist, and shaming your fellow black brothers and sisters who don't act like you or have what you have. Mentor, give back, but stop the judgment, stop with the holier than thou attitudes.
Because if we really want to save our children, it takes a collective effort, and for the masses to give a damn!
Until next time....
To black intellectuals, please stop with the respectability bullshit. You know what I am talking about: the conversations about how voting brings change, stop sagging pants, stop watching and/or starring in reality shows, stop shaming our race. The list goes on and on.
Question for all of you pseudo intellectuals: Would you tell a rape victim to stop sleeping with men, or stop wearing short clothes to entice men? Would you blame her for her rape? No, you wouldn't! First of all, it is disgusting. Secondly, it is not the politically correct thing to do, and we all know how we love to be pc.
Well, if you wouldn't treat a rape victim in that manner, why are you blaming black people for over 400 years of systematic, institutionalized peril?
It takes all types of people to make the world what it is, from the Harvard University professor to the teen with the sagging pants, our culture is comprised of a beautiful rainbow of people, and their diversity, and their differences are what make this world so great.
We all have rights, designated by the Constitution, which should be upheld by both politicians, law enforcement, and private citizens.
Those rights include: the ability to walk to a local store and return home safely to your parents (Mike Brown, Trayvon Martin), the ability to play your music at whatever volume you choose in a public place, and still make it home safely to your parents (Jordan Davis), and the ability to have a car wreck, and knock on someone's door seeking help and not face an assassin's bullet (Renisha McBride, Jonathan Ferrell), to shop in Wal-Mart, purchase a toy gun, and not be gunned down for it in an open carry state(John Crawford), and to walk the streets of LA and know that you will go home and live another day (Ezell Ford).
Remember MLK? The man who white racists used to quell black anger when we have received some type of injustice, or the go to guy that black intellectuals use to "shame" others for their behavior. He was beyond respectable: graduated from high school at 15, had a doctorate by age 26, beautiful wife, children, didn't sag his pants, Baptist minister, freedom fighter, but it didn't stop James Earl Ray from shooting him dead at the tender age of 39.
Do you know Forest Whitaker? There is not anyone in the entertainment industry with a more impressive resume. He is both a multi-talented actor and director, but he was racially profiled in a New York deli, just one month after Trayvon Martin's murder.
So if it were as easy as respectability, most of us, would never have any worries, but the truth is whether you are wearing a three piece suit, speak the Queen's English, and have over 40 honorary degrees like the late, great Dr. Maya Angelou, to the right racist, your respectability doesn't mean a hill of beans, and could still lead you to an early grave.
So instead of respectability conversations, let's have deeper, more change inducing conversations. Let's finally confront systematic racism.
I need my fellow white brothers and sisters to speak on it, combat it. Stop worrying about your country club status, and your friends and family blacklisting you, and speak!
I need for my fellow black brothers and sisters to stop making excuses for it, pretending it doesn't exist, and shaming your fellow black brothers and sisters who don't act like you or have what you have. Mentor, give back, but stop the judgment, stop with the holier than thou attitudes.
Because if we really want to save our children, it takes a collective effort, and for the masses to give a damn!
Until next time....
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